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Thursday, February 9, 2012

Twenty-five Painfully Uninteresting Things

For reasons I can't go into now, this has been an incredibly emotionally exhausting 24 hours.  I am drained and gloomy and if I tried to write from the heart right now, it might look like the scary scene in a horror movie, so I'm going to refrain and join the 25 things linky party, instead.  Nothing cures broken-heartedness like random blabbering and shopping for a shabby chic comforter...OMGRUFFLES.  (Oops, I forgot to say "spoiler alert.")

Here goes:

1.  I went to an allergist the other day and had the most amazing hour of medical information I've ever had.  I am feeling hopeful about all-around health/body improvement.

2.  I might be gluten intolerant... a blood test was done, awaiting results.

3.  In the meantime, I may or may not be eating all the gluten-full products I can get my hot little hands on just in case the test is positive.

4.  Allergist begged me to toss my down comforter.  There was much crying and gnashing of teeth over this.

5.  But then I realized it was an excuse to shop for new pretty bedroom stuff and OK, you twisted my arm.  Retail therapy, it is.

6.  Tonight, I'm going to T.J. Maxx and Target.

7.  Heaven closely resembles the inside of T.J. Maxx and Target only with gold instead of linoleum on the floor.  It's true.  Look it up.

8.  The terrible twos got nothing on the torturous threes, and it comes, this week, with a side of vicious older-kid sibling rivalry and a competition for the most dramatic child that ever lived.  At this point, my kids just might kill each other and I just might let them.

9.  My house goes from zero to disaster in 0.3 seconds, and I think my husband and kids are conspiring to break this record.

10.  IfIhavetopickupdirtytissuesorchewedupfruitsnacksofftheflooronemoretimeI'mgoingtolosemyeverlovingmind.

11.  This month, I went 8 days without coffee.  I sincerely regret ever leaving my true love, and we have been happily reunited till death do us part.

12.  I am officially going on 6 weeks with the bronchitis/pneumonia/sinus infection/world-class cough that will probably be the death of me.  Someone, write a eulogy.  Gold-paved Target, here I come.

13.  Although I love the freedom of working at home, the lack of creativity in my job is absolutely.killing.me. Something has to give, here.  Spending 8 hours a day in a creatively sterile environment is sucking the life out of me.

14.  I signed up for a fiction writing class.  I start in 6 days.  I've never written fiction before, should be fun.

15.  My 8-year-old daughter, unbeknownst to me, went to school with one sockless foot today.  She told her teacher it was because she "only had one sock" (she has exactly seventeen thousand six hundred and eighty seven pairs of socks at last count).  Last week, she left her coat in the car and came home with one the school had given her "for kids without coats".  The faculty at her school either thinks we are dirt poor and can only afford one sock at a time or that I am the least attentive mother in the history of the world.  In reality, my investigative skills are just not that sharp when the kids leave the house at 6 a.m. and the sun hasn't even woken up yet.

16.  Since I started writing this, I have since been out shopping at 3 different places and had an impromptu dinner date with my husband.

17.  I'm not dead yet.  Target's floor's were just plain old linoleum.

18.  I bought a Shabby Chic comforter but bought it home and didn't like it.  Tomorrow, I'll exchange it for the one I had planned to buy before I went inside the store and got distracted.

19.  Now that we're here and settled in, it is becoming apparent that our hearts are still very much planted in the foster care system.  Progressing, prayerfully, toward certification back in this state and excited to see if/when/what will develop from there.

20.  I have had an incredibly trying week emotionally, physically, and spiritually, but it has also been a week of tremendous clarity and a haze of peace and acceptance is beginning to form over the whole lot of things.

21.  It is 11:31 p.m. right now.  My youngest just walked in the room and said, "Good morning," then proceeded to have a melt-down.  He is wide awake and royally ticked off.  This is bad news, friends.

22.  Yawn.

23.  I have an unnaturally strong affection for red and white polka dots.  And peanut butter cups.  And decorating magazines.  And French fries.

24.  I aspire to buy a shoddy old 70's camp trailer and spruce it up with some thrifted love and loads of elbow grease, then use it as our home away from home for camping.

25.  This took me longer to write than 90% of the posts on my blog and it was probably less interesting than 90% of the posts on my blog.  I got bored with myself somewhere around number four.  I am putting my own self to sleep, I'm so boring.

G'night friends... if I can still call you that after that long and arduous link-up!  Zzzzz....

(Linking to:  PerfectlyImperfect's 25 Things Linky Party!)


  1. Thanks for stopping by my blog! I enjoyed your list, what's boring to you is fascinating to others, lol! Isn't that a strange paradox? Look forward to reading more posts from you! :)

  2. I love when you write from the heart, but I also really, really loved this too. I laughed through the whole thing, including your daughter going to school with one sock. AND getting rid of your down comforter...I told my allergist that I did, but...um, I didn't.

  3. I loved this post because it showed a snap shot of your life and I'm sorry for all your medical ickiies!

  4. The Hell on Heels HousewifeFebruary 10, 2012 at 5:47 PM

    Laughing through the whole thing...can totally relate!

  5. Rebekah from Simply RebekahFebruary 16, 2012 at 11:41 AM

    Oh my word!  You totally crack me up.  This whole thing was hilarious.  I'm finally going through my "Relevant" business cards and wanted to stop by to say hello.  (I guess I can't call it that anymore, huh?)  I'm so glad I visited.


Your comments are such an encouragement. Thank you for sharing your valuable words.