Linking to Gypsy Mama’s Five Minute Friday. Writing for 5 minutes, without regard to perfection…
The topic, today… If I Knew I Could, I Would. I should say something selfless. I should say… if I knew I could sell my possessions and give them to the poor, I would. I would feed the hungry. I would live like Christ. If I knew I could, I would adopt Ukranian orphans or go to seminary or any other altruistic act of love.
Today, though, that’s not the truth. Today, If {only} I Knew I Could… I’d escape.
I'm under the weather this week. Head clouded, pressured, pounding. Eleven kids in this house that felt, yesterday, like seventy two, all the needs, all the words, all the wounds. So much to do. So drained, so tired. Today, I’m dreaming of retreat, breathing deep to fight the urge to puddle on the floor, to yell, to grump and gripe, to crawl in bed and stay there awhile.
Today, if I knew I could… I would crawl away to a cabin in the woods or on the beach or anywhere really, with a couple of candles and maybe even a glass of Riesling, and I’d pour over the Word while it poured back into me, filled me with what I needed, and I’d write and write and write and write until I was empty of words, and I’d sleep and wake and write and read some more. And no one would whine or vomit or poop or bleed or hunger or argue or need me at all. I would sweep dust from floorboards and words would float all around and Word would float all around and I’d be restored.
Oh my gosh I love this. I laughed at your poo and vomit remark and then wondered and awed at your closing sentence. You are a wordsmith. Thank you for this :)
ReplyDeleteSherri Ohler
www.thepaintedlife.com
www.sdgartistry.com
It may not seem to be altruistic to want a retreat, to escape, but it's self-sacrificing to stick around and be the one needed. It's God-honoring when you "fight the urge to puddle on the floor, to yell, to grump and gripe, to crawl in bed and stay there awhile." So don't be too hard on yourself. =) Thanks for sharing in the way you do.
ReplyDeletei laughed out loud at your opening paragraph! i thought the same thing. and i'm so with you on the rest! thanks for your comment on mine! i hope you feel better soon!
ReplyDeletePraying that restoration for you. Even if it doesn't take place in a cabin in the woods, I hope that you find rest. And if nothing else, we'll pray for no poop and vomit:)
ReplyDeleteFeel better soon, Cara. And needing a retreat is not selfish - it is just need. And I hope that you find more than five minutes to drink that glass of Riesling and enjoy the Word. Thank you so much for sharing your words and your heart with us.
ReplyDeleteCara, I hope that you get to feeling better soon. Thinking of you and praying for you today!
ReplyDeleteOh yes, friend, a retreat would be so lovely! Beach house or mountain cabin. Maybe in the counting, in the fully living the joyful moments, we will find that escape? Praying for you girl!
ReplyDeletelove this. what a great idea. i can so relate!
ReplyDeleteThis was very well done. :)
ReplyDeleteI hear you on the puking and pooping. Some days it seems like that's all that happens. It makes me think of the old Calgon commercials.
oh, i know this feeling. when my boy-babe weans, i want to take an overnight silent retreat. a true sabbath, just like you wrote. it sounds delicious.
ReplyDeleteHey there, Cara! Just read about you on (in)courage. Congrats on the sponsorship!
ReplyDeleteHey there, Cara! Just read about you on (in)courage. Congrats on the sponsorship!
ReplyDeleteOh yes, friend, a retreat would be so lovely! Beach house or mountain cabin. Maybe in the counting, in the fully living the joyful moments, we will find that escape? Praying for you girl!
ReplyDeletePraying that restoration for you. Even if it doesn't take place in a cabin in the woods, I hope that you find rest. And if nothing else, we'll pray for no poop and vomit:)
ReplyDeleteIt may not seem to be altruistic to want a retreat, to escape, but it's self-sacrificing to stick around and be the one needed. It's God-honoring when you "fight the urge to puddle on the floor, to yell, to grump and gripe, to crawl in bed and stay there awhile." So don't be too hard on yourself. =) Thanks for sharing in the way you do.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh I love this. I laughed at your poo and vomit remark and then wondered and awed at your closing sentence. You are a wordsmith. Thank you for this :)
ReplyDeleteSherri Ohler
www.thepaintedlife.com
www.sdgartistry.com